By Rachael Phelps | Ministry Intern serving at Audubon Park UMC in Spokane, WA
“Only 9 months?”
[dropcap]T[/dropcap]he thought repeatedly crept into my mind throughout my first day visiting Audubon Park United Methodist Church. That Sunday I attended two worship services, had lunch with the pastor and his wife, attended a church potluck, and ended the day at a young adult fellowship gathering.
As the day went on, I found myself ready to sprint, settle, dive, and soak into this place that was already bringing me joy. I was all in.
As a recent college graduate, the past year of my life has been a season of lasts and goodbyes. My time as a student slowly yet all too rapidly came to a close, and I often found myself fearful of what these endings would look like. I wondered where each of my friends would end up, I wondered where I would end up, and I wished for more time.
When the allotted time inevitably ran out, I sought both physical and emotional rest. After a year of tumult, questions, imperative deadlines, all culminating in the loss of the life I had built in my college town, I felt depleted and sad. I began to look for a journey of renewal.
The questions and uncertainty of things to come continued, even after I had learned of my acceptance into the Ministry Internship Project, and eventually my placement at Audubon Park. I held these feelings in tension with the excitement that began to take root as my move to Spokane grew closer.
“A dream come true” is the way I found myself describing this discernment opportunity to friends and family. I had started feeling called into ministry about two years prior, and no other words seemed to encapsulate the way I felt about this chance to explore that call full time. My excitement evolved into elation throughout my visit that first Sunday, into my first week of work.
The people of Audubon Park UMC are kind. They are welcoming, they are hospitable, they are generous. They have supported and cared for me as I have made the transition into a resident of Spokane and invited me into their church family with open arms.
With each day names and faces have become more familiar. Now that initial welcoming has subsided, I have begun to settle into the daily realities of ministry at Audubon Park UMC. Wonderful things are happening here. The church runs a food bank, serving coffee and snacks to clients while they wait for their turn. Christian education ministries, music of varying styles, and increasing worship attendance can all be seen on Sundays.
But there is also history. There are memories of misunderstandings and wounds not yet healed. There has been loss, mistakes made, discouragement, and frustration. There are questions that remain unanswered.
As the jubilation of the initial phase of this journey began to taper off, I realized that Audubon Park UMC and I have these things in common.
The realization that I was no longer in the safe confines of school came quickly when classes at my alma mater resumed without me. The sting of lost relationships resurfaced. The questioning of purpose and capability began. The things I had left behind caught up to me.
“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland,” the prophet Isaiah tells us.
Audubon Park and I have each been through the wilderness. We have seen the wasteland. And if we choose to stay there, if we don’t look up, we might miss it.
We might miss this new thing that God is doing.
My first four weeks at Audubon Park UMC have consisted of one slow, deep breath. A preparation of sorts, exhaling the old, inhaling the new. Letting go of the past, embracing the present.
With readied eyes, I look forward with hope.
I hope that I would leave this place with a longer list of questions than with which I began.
I hope to be challenged.
I hope to experience every opportunity.
I hope to be surprised.
Author and singer Renee Yohe has this to say about hope:
“Hope is believing in the process. It’s not contingent on perfection or resolution. It’s just that we keep believing.”
Accepting this invitation, I turn these hopes over to God and choose to believe in this process. I choose to trust. I trust that I am right where I need to be, and that is enough. I trust that the God who made a way through the sea is also making a way in my life, and calling me to explore ministry.
I trust that God is making all things new.
May my new church family find renewed energy.
May we learn and grow together.
May we get on board with this “new thing” at every step of the way.
May my eyes and ears be attentive, may my heart be present.
May I make the most of these 8 months that remain.
Rachael Phelps is a 23 year-old graduate of Central Washington University, where she studied Psychology and Religious Studies. She was born and raised in Seattle, Washington and has been a member of the United Methodist Church since 2006. She is passionate about the work of the church, as it seeks to further God’s kingdom on earth. She loves singing, playing the guitar, Zumba, musicals, and drinking coffee.
