{"id":5653,"date":"2013-11-04T07:54:24","date_gmt":"2013-11-04T15:54:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/?p=5653"},"modified":"2013-11-04T07:54:46","modified_gmt":"2013-11-04T15:54:46","slug":"united-methodist-campuses-fight-bullying","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/united-methodist-campuses-fight-bullying\/","title":{"rendered":"United Methodist campuses fight bullying"},"content":{"rendered":"

Cell phones can be used as tools by college bullies to intimidate others. A UMNS photo illustration by Kathleen Barry.<\/em><\/p>\n

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A UMNS Report by Susan Passi-Klaus*<\/strong><\/p>\n

READING, Pa. (UMNS)<\/em> –\u00a0One would think kids would stop picking on each other when they get to college. Not true, said Brent Harger, assistant professor of sociology at United Methodist-related\u00a0Albright College<\/a>\u00a0in Reading, Pa.<\/p>\n

\u201cStudents on college campuses might not call it bullying because they think bullying is just a child\u2019s thing,\u201d Harger said. \u201cInstead, they may refer to it as \u2018drama,\u2019 but no matter what label they give it, it ends up with one person constantly going out of their way to make another person miserable.\u201d<\/p>\n

When kids are younger, meanness might be limited to calling names or stealing money, but the nastiness can escalate in college, especially when bullies use smartphones, social media, text messages, emails and instant messages to be cruel.<\/p>\n

According to a study conducted in 2008 at\u00a0Union College<\/a>\u00a0in Schenectady, N.Y., 82 percent of students surveyed had witnessed bullying on campus. Every study participant also said bullying in college occurs at a higher rate than in high school.<\/p>\n

Apparently, college students are not very different from seventh- and eighth-graders. Middle school is the peak time for bullying. It wanes a little in high school, but by the time kids get to college, their childhood patterns re-emerge.<\/p>\n

\u201cSomewhere along the line, somebody got the idea that when you graduate from high school, all your past hurts got left behind,\u201d said the Rev. Paul Clark, Albright chaplain. \u201cThey were wrong.<\/p>\n

“What I see is students bringing old pain with them,\u201d he said. \u201cWhether they have been bullied or are the bullier, old patterns resurface. It\u2019s a drag.\u201d<\/p>\n

Wanting to belong<\/h3>\n

Information distributed by the\u00a0Alberti Center for Bullying Abuse Prevention\u200e<\/a>\u00a0states that all students, regardless of race, ethnicity, gender, physical condition, popularity or weight, could be targets of bullying and cyberbullying.<\/p>\n

Reasons for bullying are what many would call petty \u2014 making fun of the shoes someone wears or the backpack they carry. Students can fuss over how peers talk, where they come from or their status \u2014 whether they are a \u201chave\u201d or a \u201chave not.\u201d<\/p>\n

When students first arrive at college, they often look for the same thing they sought in middle school \u2014 to be included, to fit in. The problem is that it takes time for them to find their niche, which may not include roommates, classmates, campus cliques or people who share the same table in the dining hall.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt takes students longer to get together with others who are like-minded than people think,\u201d Harger said. \u201cA student who is just starting college and doesn\u2019t know many people might put a lot of emphasis on what a roommate thinks of his or her clothing or interests. On the other hand, a student who feels like he or she is a part of a larger group is more likely to disregard comments from somebody who is not a part of that group.\u201d<\/p>\n

Harger said the challenge is to help students make connections to feel they are part of the community. Some students may find community in Greek life or sports teams, but for others, it might be the biology club or faith-based groups.<\/p>\n

Clark acknowledged that one of the biggest triggers for desperate behavior is loneliness. \u201cWhat people really want is to belong.\u201d<\/p>\n

Cyberbullying targets vulnerability<\/h3>\n

Part of the sensitivity problem might be something Clark calls \u201chyper-alienation.\u201d He has noticed that when students give themselves over to technology, it separates them from themselves and others.<\/p>\n

\u201cOften, students come in for counseling and put their cell phone right beside them where they can listen for its buzz and check to see who is calling,\u201d Clark said. \u201cTheir cell phone is their best friend.\u201d<\/p>\n

Bullies also use cell phones and computers to intimidate and coerce others.<\/p>\n

Using electronic devices and new technologies to send harmful psychological messages or threaten a person in a negative way is cyberbullying. It can range from making a full-blown physical threat to posting an embarrassing photograph.<\/p>\n

\u201cCyberbullying amps up the attention paid to someone who is different,\u201d Harger said. \u201cBullying becomes very public, and victims may feel like the entire campus is looking at them and judging them. They become very vulnerable, even though it may not involve everyone on campus.\u201d<\/p>\n

Adolph Brown, a master teacher and lecturer, is one of few public speakers talking about college bullying. Brown has two college-age children. His 19-year-old daughter, Maranda, attends United Methodist-related\u00a0Virginia Wesleyan College.<\/a>\u00a0Son, Adolph, 20, attends\u00a0Virginia State University.<\/a><\/p>\n

\u201cWhen students are not taught to behave consistently in a Christlike manner, that\u2019s when maladaptive behaviors become the norm,\u201d Brown said. \u201cCharacter is not just important for my child, but for every child on campus. Positive behavior is contagious.\u201d<\/p>\n

Zero tolerance<\/h3>\n

Colleges are just beginning to address students who \u201cpick on each other\u201d to the point of doing harm. Whether it\u2019s physical bullying (hitting, kicking, spitting, pushing and biting); verbal bullying (taunting, name-calling, threatening and belittling); or psychological bullying (spreading rumors, social exclusion, intimidation, extortion and sexual harassment), Clark said schools like United Methodist-related Albright have zero tolerance of hateful behavior toward other students.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe just can\u2019t have that,\u201d he said. \u201cThat\u2019s not how human beings can live together. It destroys communities.\u201d<\/p>\n

Clark, Harger and their colleagues work to find solutions to relationship problems. Albright offers everything from an early-alert process and non-violence training to spiritual direction classes and student \u201ccheck-ins.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAll of the institutions in the United Methodist education connection strive to build moral and ethical character and strengthen community,\u201d said Gerald D. Lord, an executive with the United Methodist Board of Higher Education and Ministry. \u201cThe values our colleges instill in students affect their experiences on campus as well as the rest of their lives. That\u2019s one characteristic that sets United Methodist-related colleges apart from the rest.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe are a United Methodist college,\u201d Clark said. \u201cI consider my place here to be crucial in bringing a spiritual presence and healing. Most of the people who seek me out are often referred to as the \u2018unchurched,\u2019 but people without a spiritual connection can often find it in the chaplain\u2019s office.\u201d<\/p>\n

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