{"id":4816,"date":"2013-08-12T18:00:04","date_gmt":"2013-08-13T01:00:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/?p=4816"},"modified":"2013-08-26T17:15:31","modified_gmt":"2013-08-27T00:15:31","slug":"nurturing-elders-community-conversations-explore-end-of-life","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/nurturing-elders-community-conversations-explore-end-of-life\/","title":{"rendered":"Nurturing Elders: Community Conversations Explore End-of-Life"},"content":{"rendered":"<style><!--\np.padding {padding-left:.5cm;}\n--><\/style>\n<p><center><em>Hourglass image courtesy of Wikipedia.  For more info, click <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/File:Wooden_hourglass_3.jpg\" target=\"_blank\">here<\/em><\/center><\/a>.<\/p>\n<hr>\n<p><em>Nurturing Elders and Others: <\/em><br \/>\n<strong>Community Conversations Explore End-of-Life<\/strong><br \/>\n<em>By The Rev. Paul Graves \u2022 <a href=\"mailto:elderadvocates@nctv.com?Subject=Re: Community Conversations Explore End-of-Life\">elderadvocates@nctv.com<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n<p>This month, I want to share a simple story with you about how my consulting ministry on aging &#8211; Elder Advocates &#8211; took a little different shape this past year.  Perhaps it will give you a new idea, or the courage to pursue an idea you\u2019ve played with far too long without acting on it.<\/p>\n<p>A year ago, the local Episcopal Church in Sandpoint, Idaho approached me in helping to put together a public event to discuss end-of-life issues.  The initiator of this effort was Nolan, a retired Episcopal priest, who had stage IV cancer.  He and his wife, Vira, wanted to use his situation to show folks how important it is to talk about end-of-life with family and friends \u201cbefore it\u2019s too late\u201d.  To date, we have hosted two \u201cCommunity Conversations\u201d in Sandpoint.<br \/>\n<!--more Learn about these Community Conversations (more)--><br \/>\nAbout 60 persons have attended each conversation and have reported how helpful they have been to them.  We were a bit shocked that this many people would come together on a Saturday morning in Sandpoint to talk about death, dying, and how to live before you die.  But we were also thrilled.<\/p>\n<p>The first event was entitled \u201cIs There Life Before Death?  A community conversation about embracing life, and dying, every day.\u201d  The poster\/flyer then issued this invitation:  \u201cHave you or a loved one been diagnosed with a terminal illness?  Can we remove fear, attain acceptance, and live with grief?  Are you the diagnosed person, spouse, caregiver, concerned family member, friend?  We\u2019re all on this journey of life.  So as we anticipate our physical deaths sooner or later, our challenge is to inject a passion for living into each and every day.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>So our intent was to be as up front &#8212; and upbeat &#8212; as possible about this end-of-life journey we all take.  Nolan and Vira particularly wanted to let folks know their way of dealing with his disease process (that they called \u201cdead man walking\u201d) worked for them.  They wanted to encourage others to find healthy ways to deal with their own issues.<\/p>\n<p>Participants overwhelmingly asked us to do another \u201cCommunity Conversation.\u201d  So, in January 2013, we hosted \u201cI Don\u2019t Know What to Say\u2026\u201d  This second community conversation about end-of-life issues focused on our struggles to community with, and support, persons we care about before a crisis, during a crisis, and after a crisis.<\/p>\n<p>One of the very helpful resources we found, and shared, was the \u201cConversation Starter Kit\u201d put out by The Conversation Project.  This collection of gentle but direct questions is a great way to begin that important conversation with your family members.  You can download the kit at www.conversationproject.org.<\/p>\n<p>After a successful second event, we discovered that the word \u201cconversation\u201d originally had nothing to do with talking.  Back in the 14th century, it dealt more with \u201cliving together\u201d in some form of community.  What a great discovery for us!  That \u201cliving together\u201d in healthy ways is what our events hoped to encourage.<br \/>\nCurrently, we are assisting an Episcopal Church in Coeur d\u2019Alene, Idaho to start its own Community Conversation.  We are also planning our next event in Sandpoint.  The topic isn\u2019t settled yet.<\/p>\n<p>One real bonus of this year\u2019s work: our planning meetings have turned into a significant small group for us all.<\/p>\n<p>What about Nolan and Vira?  He reported to us in late June that his doctors have pronounced him cancer-free!  He attributes that news to prayer by many folks, but also to the incredible support he has received in our small group\/ planning committee.  Now they live with a \u201csecond chance\u201d kind of hope.  So might we all! <\/p>\n<p><center><em>The Rev. Paul Graves serves as the chair for the Council on Older Adult Ministries for the PNWUMC<\/em><\/center><\/p>\n<hr>\n<table>\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td><a href=\"http:\/\/www.rqmweb.com\/results.asp?q=pnwumc&#038;resID=2764&#038;detail=Y\" target=\"_blank\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Living Fully, Dying Well (4497)\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/08\/RESOURCES_LivingFull.jpg?w=696\" \/><\/a><\/td>\n<td>\n<p class=\"padding\"><a href=\"http:\/\/www.rqmweb.com\/results.asp?q=pnwumc&#038;resID=2764&#038;detail=Y\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>Living Fully, Dying Well (4497)<\/strong><\/a><br \/>\nOur best decisions about life\u2019s important events are seldom made in a time of crisis.  \u201cLiving Fully, Dying Well\u201d helps us make careful, wise and prayerful preparation for meeting life\u2019s most important moments.  To reserve this video now, e-mail <a href=\"mailto:ejohanson@pnwumc.org?Subject=Re: Living Fully, Dying Well (4497)\">The Regional Media Center<\/a>.<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<p><\/p>\n<hr>\n<table>\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td><a href=\"http:\/\/www.rqmweb.com\/results.asp?q=pnwumc&#038;resID=2904&#038;detail=Y\" target=\"_blank\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Reflections of Psalm 23 for People with Cancer (D4608)\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/08\/RESOURCES_ReflectionsPsalm.jpg?w=696\" \/><\/a><\/td>\n<td>\n<p class=\"padding\"><a href=\"http:\/\/www.rqmweb.com\/results.asp?q=pnwumc&#038;resID=2904&#038;detail=Y\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>Reflections of Psalm 23 for People with Cancer (D4608)  <\/strong><\/a><br \/>\nKen Curtis, founder and president of Gateway Films\/Vision Video and the Christian History Institute, was diagnosed with advanced cancer with little prospect for survival.  Psalm 23 was a vital part of his spiritual journey \u201cthrough the valley of the shadow of death\u201d.  This video explores his personal experience of battling cancer with the spiritual resources of scripture.To reserve this video now, e-mail <a href=\"mailto:ejohanson@pnwumc.org?Subject=Re: Reflections of Psalm 23 for People with Cancer (D4608)\">The Regional Media Center<\/a>.<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<p><\/p>\n<hr>\n<table>\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td valign=\"center\"><a href=\"http:\/\/www.pnwumc.org\/channels\" target=\"_blank\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Channels 64, August 2013\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/08\/Channels64_Cover.jpg?w=696\" \/><\/a><\/td>\n<td valign=\"top\">\n<p class=\"padding\"><a href=\"http:\/\/www.pnwumc.org\/channels\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>DOWNLOAD Channels 64, August 2013!<\/strong><\/a><br \/>\nTrayvon Martin\/George Zimmerman reactions \u2022 Mission u \u2022 5 Columns of Mission Churches \u2022 UMVIMs needed through September 2013 \u2022 My Life as a Conference Treasurer \u2022 Step By Step &#8211; Ministry in Haiti \u2022 The Twitter Effect @ #pnwac13 \u2022 Salmon Creek UMC&#8217;s Meal-in-a-Peel \u2022 The Inland Northwest P.E.T. Project \u2022 Campus Connection: Campus Ministries in the PNW \u2022 Musings: Change the UMC, Change the World \u2022 Dave&#8217;s Dibble: Entertainment Bar is Rising \u2022 Adapting to Lead: A Message from our Bishop \u2022 Nurturing Elders &#038; Others: Community Conversations explore end-of-life \u2022 To subscribe to our print or web editions, e-mail <a href=\"mailto:channels@pnwumc.org?Subject=Re: Sign me up for Channels!\">Channels<\/a>.<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<p><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Hourglass image courtesy of Wikipedia. For more info, click here. Nurturing Elders and Others: Community Conversations Explore End-of-Life By The Rev. Paul Graves \u2022 elderadvocates@nctv.com This month, I want to share a simple story with you about how my consulting ministry on aging &#8211; Elder Advocates &#8211; took a little different shape this past year. [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":51,"featured_media":4818,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[111,6,142],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-4816","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-channels","8":"category-conversation","9":"category-older-adult-ministries"},"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/08\/INSIGHTS_Elders.jpg?fit=600%2C308&ssl=1","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2l75j-1fG","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4816","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/51"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4816"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4816\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4828,"href":"https:\/\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4816\/revisions\/4828"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/4818"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4816"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4816"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pnwumc.org\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4816"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}